Welcome inside;I don't define myself by my job... too limiting for damn sure, but I will tell you this:
I love my Job
I love my Life
I am pretty damn close to being the person I wanted to be, when I grew up.
This is the secret to my power... so to speak.
How many other people can make this claim?
How many people are even aware enough to try?
Oh sure, I have shortcomings, and obstacles... and places where I just don't
hit the high marks I hold for myself... Trust me no one is as hard on me as I am… and I am nowhere near as hard on anyone as I am on myself… I’m smart enough to know how lucky I have it… Clever enough to know what we (and I) have worked for… and accomplished. I don’t have everything I want, but there aren't any people in the world whose life I would trade for my own... Mind you, I wouldn’t mind Bill Gates’ money, Brad Pitt or Johnny Depp’s looks or Hugh Hefner’s job (Oh Yeah!)… But only if I could still be ‘Me’.
I think I am both extremely simple, basic even… and terribly complicated – Like everything else, even a description of me is a puzzle – who would have thought the dumb silly blond on stage had anything going-on under that mop eh?
I like the word "dichotomy" to describe me...
Two (or more) aspects embraced in the same whole...
So many dichotomies to describe me:
I am a geek, with long hair
I am a woman, with a penis. (Go ahead and laugh, that line got me a great girl once!)
I am so straight; I can easily flit about on stage -
My life is based on "planned improvisation"
I am anal retentive... in all my chaos --- actually; I hate the phrase "anal retentive" it's so misleading... the only things I retain in my anus are the appropriate things... and then only till the appropriate time <g>
I’m an atheist (Swear to God!) and yet I still am left breathless by a sunset…
I worship no one, no thing.
The only thing sacred is life. (More on that). The only thing ‘holy’ is the power that only women possess; that to create people. Women rock! I think they are so awesome... chicks have all the cool clothes, all the ability and talent… and are so damn much fun to look at. (I am in love with the potential in all people, especially woman, and so universally disappointed in the vast majority of the human race... people rarely fail to live down to my lowest expectations for them)
So yes... women rock, but if I were ever one (no thank you) I would have to be a lesbian. I have actually joked about this for years!
If I had a religion, and could choose who/how to worship... I have often
thought I would choose Pan... think of it, your church is nature, your God
is mishcievous... and your services are singing and dancing and sex...
waaa-hooo!
Perhaps I should choose Janus, the two faced God. Both aspects (happy-sad,
comedy-tragedy) in one head. Isn't he the patron God of actors? (A clue to me... everything is a show... except when it's not) But no, all I can believe in is me… Hell even one of the few things I had the most ‘faith’ in; (einsteinian law) has turned-out to be faulty. Another clue: If I ever meet a woman who really understands how unsettling it was to me to find out that the speed of light has been exceeded – I’ll marry her! Especially if she knows why it’s adorable for me to call her “Boo-boo, kitty-fuck”!
